An Octopus walks into a bar and says "I can play ANY musical instrument
you like".
Englishman gives him a guitar which he plays better than Hendrix.
Irishman gives him a piano which he plays better than Elton.
Scotsman throws him a set of bag pipes.
The octopus fumbles about for a couple of minutes
and the Scotsman says "What's wrong - can ye no play it?"
The octopus says "Play it?
- I'm gonna fuck her brains oot once a get her pyjamas off!"
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