Friendship Scottish Style Aye!

True   Friendship... SCOTTISH STYLE!! 

(None of that Sissy shite)

Are ye tired o those pish weak 'friendship' poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?   Well, here are a series o promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cute wee smiley faces on this card .

Just the stone cold truth o a great friendship.   
 

1. When ye are sad --  I will help you get pished and plot revenge against the bastard who made ye sad. 

2. When ye are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking ye.

3. When ye smile -- I will know ye are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in. 

4. When ye are scared -- I will take the pish oot o you every chance I get,

 until you're NOT.

5. When ye are worried -- I will tell ye stories about how much worse it could be until   YE STOP WHINING!

 

6.. When yer confused -- I will try to use only wee words.

 

7.. When ye are sick --  Stay the fuck away frae me until ye are well again. 

I don't want whatever ye've got.

 

8.. When ye fall,  I will laugh my fuckin heed aff at you, you clumsy arse,

........but I'll help you up.

 

9.. This is my oath.... I pledge it tae the end.

'Why?' you may ask;

Because you are my friend.

 

Friendship is like pishing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.