There is Nothing as English as a Scotch Egg

The joy of Scotch Eggs is discussed by The Hitch.

As he so eloquently puts it.

Like all scotch eggs it tastes shit , only a Scottish cunt could have come up with the concept.

Funny because it was some English cunt from Fortnum and Mason of all places who figured out this delicacy junk food to inflict on poor unsuspecting snooty customers in 1738. No doubt the Scotch Egg was a joke on Scottish frugality.

My memories of Scotch Eggs was how difficult they are to make, getting the oozy sausage stuff to form around the egg. One of those things that are better to buy from the butcher.

For something genuinely Scottish, I can recommend the following.

Haggis Ingredients

"sheep's stomach bag
1 sheep's pluck - liver, lungs and heart
3 onions
250g beef Suet
150g oatmeal
salt and black pepper
a pinch of cayenne
150mls of stock/gravy


Haggis Cooking Directions:


1. Clean the stomach bag thoroughly and soak overnight. In the morning turn it inside out.

2. Wash the pluck and boil for 1.5 hours, ensuring the windpipe hangs over the pot allowing drainage of the impurities.

3. Mince the heart and lungs and grate half the liver.

4. Chop up the onions and suet.

5. Warm the oatmeal in the oven.

6. Mix all the above together and season with the salt and pepper. Then add the cayenne.

7. Pour over enough of the pluck boiled water to make the mixture watery.

8. Fill the bag with the mixture until it's half full.

9. Press out the air and sew the bag up.

10. Boil for 3 hours (you may need to prick the bag with a wee needle if it looks like blowing up!) without the lid on.

11. Serve with neeps and tatties."

Delicious.

For Afters, Hercules recommends the following. That way you wont remember anything.