Eddie the Eagle debuts for England

Dave Darren Pattinson (who?) debuted for England today at Headingley against the South Africans and is at the batting crease as I write. He must be good, since he moved Monty, who makes Glenn McGrath look like a top order batsman up the batting order. Batted behind Monty is hardly a ringing endorsement, but then he is there to bowl.

He was optimistically announced by the Cricinfo Commentary team. They obviously have high hopes for him as England offer up a sorry excuse for a cricket team yet again.

It's a procession, and now, into the fray comes the debutant Grimsby-born roof-tiling medium-pacer from Melbourne. The Chris Powell of England cricket selection? It's not tea after all, incidentally.

Who are those guys who are playing a test at Cardiff next year? Perhaps they are looking for his Aussie sledging experience to unhinge Rickie and the boys when they show up this time next year.

And why do I still support them?

Update: Two slogs and he is out. Eight more than the Captain and Monty combined. England all out for 203. Time to go to work Mr Pattinson (and Mr Flintoff).