CONSTITUTIONAL EXCLUSIVE: 50 WAYS TO WIN GOVERNMENT | Daily Telegraph Joe Hildebrand Blog

via blogs.news.com.au

Both Labor and the Coalition claim they have the right to form Government under Australia’s complex constitutional conventions. However in yet another extraordinary exclusive, the Joe Hildebrand Blog can reveal there are a number of criteria to decide who has the mandate to seek a majority in Parliament...
1 The party that has the most seats
2 The party that has the highest primary vote
3 The party that has the highest two-party preferred vote
4 The party that has the highest two-party preferred vote in the highest number of seats
5 The party that has the highest MPs (ie. the Greens)
6 The party that runs the best focus groups
7 The focus groups that run the best party
8 The focus groups that host the best party
9 The party with the most women
10 The party that picks up the most women
11 The party that wins Eden-Monaro
12 The party that wins Lindsay
13 The party that wins Lindsay Lohan
14 The party that finds Lindsay Lohan
15 The party that has a plan for the future
16 The party that has an action contract with the Australian people
17 The party that has a contract out on the Australian people
18 The party that can offer the most stability
19 The party that can offer the most money
20 The party that can offer its costings
21 The party that can cost its offers
22 The party that can stuff its coffers
23 The party that can stuff the coppers
24 The party backed by Marius Kloppers
25 The party that can tell the best joke
26 The party that has the most jokes*
27 The party that has the most blokes
28 The party that bums the most smokes
29 The party that snorts the most coke
30 The party with the most conservatives
31 The party with the most reds
32 The party with the most redheads
33 The party with the most deadheads (ie. the Greens)
34 The party with the best policies
35 The party with the most policies
36 The party with the best plan
37 The party with the best people
38 The best party
39 The Peter Best party
40 The Ringo Starr party
41 The Birthday Party
42 The third party insurance party
43 The arty-farty party (ie. the Greens)
44 The party in the house
45 The party in da house
46 The party with the numbers in the house
47 The party with da numbers in da house (ie. the Greens)
48 The party with the highest principles
49 The party with any principles
50 Any party
*Laurie Ferguson counts for two

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