One day in the future, OJ Simpson has a heart-attack and dies. He
immediately goes to
hell, where the devil is waiting for him.
'I don't know what to do here,' says the devil.
'You are on my list, but I have no room for you.
You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to
do. I've got a couple of
folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go,
but you have to take
their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves.'
OJ thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to
the first room.
In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. Ted kept diving in,
and surfacing, empty
handed. Over, and over, and over he dove in and surfaced with nothing.
Such was his fate
in hell.
'No,' OJ said. 'I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don't
think I could do that all
day long.'
The devil led him to the door of the next room. In it was Al Gore with
a sledgehammer and
a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after
time after time.
'No, this is no good; I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would
be in constant agony if
all I could do was break rocks all day,' commented OJ.
The devil opened a third door. Through it, OJ saw Bill Clinton, lying
on the bed, his arms
tied over his head, and his legs restrained in a spread-eagle pose.
Bent over him was
Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best.
OJ looked at this in shocked disbelief, and finally said, 'Yeah man, I
can handle this.'
The devil smiled and said...
'OK, Monica, you're free to go.'
immediately goes to
hell, where the devil is waiting for him.
'I don't know what to do here,' says the devil.
'You are on my list, but I have no room for you.
You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to
do. I've got a couple of
folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go,
but you have to take
their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves.'
OJ thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to
the first room.
In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. Ted kept diving in,
and surfacing, empty
handed. Over, and over, and over he dove in and surfaced with nothing.
Such was his fate
in hell.
'No,' OJ said. 'I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don't
think I could do that all
day long.'
The devil led him to the door of the next room. In it was Al Gore with
a sledgehammer and
a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after
time after time.
'No, this is no good; I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would
be in constant agony if
all I could do was break rocks all day,' commented OJ.
The devil opened a third door. Through it, OJ saw Bill Clinton, lying
on the bed, his arms
tied over his head, and his legs restrained in a spread-eagle pose.
Bent over him was
Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best.
OJ looked at this in shocked disbelief, and finally said, 'Yeah man, I
can handle this.'
The devil smiled and said...
'OK, Monica, you're free to go.'
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